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It's funny how the mind works. The more I work on this project, the more my brain reaches for
past experiences that might be of assistance on this journey. Many years ago when I did my first music workshop for teen unwed moms, I was sure they would all be singing with their babies by the time I left. I went in with all my passion and usual enthusiasm, and hit the brick wall that is not uncommon with this group.They are, after all, first and foremost, teenagers!
So I went home and tried to re-think my approach. I realized that before I could get them to connect with their babies through singing, they would have to connect with their own childhood stories of song. If I could help them see how they connected emotionally through music, I might be able to then motivate them to sing with their babies. So here was my shot-in-the-dark plan. I recorded five short snippets from instrumental songs. They were all background tracks from movies, so the intention of the composer was very clear. As I played each 20-second piece, I asked the girls to write down whatever emotions, pictures, or words came into their heads. The results astounded all of us! Every girl wrote down a word that was spot on with the composer's intention. For example, during an instrumental piece from the "Horse Whisperer," every girl wrote down the word horse! The final piece was an obscure medley of Disney music, which moved into When You Wish Upon A Star. By the third note of that familiar and comforting song, there was a collective "ahh," and smiles of delight on every face. As much as I know how music communicates, I was astounded by the results of my experiment. As we shared the words they had written down, something happened. One by one the girls began remembering a song or experience with singing, long ago buried inside them (the week before, with crossed arms, they had all told me they had NO memories of songs from their childhoods). As they talked they became more and more animated and emotional, and I was able to say, "See? That's the way music works. And when you sing with your baby, you are creating the same memories and bonds with them!" And then they were ready to sing with their babies. They got it! It was one of the most rewarding experiences I've ever had.
So now you ask, what does this have to do with Sing With Our Kids? Well, every time I talk to anyone about this project, they remember something. And they share their stories with me. So what I learned from those teenage moms so many years ago, and what I am being reminded of now is this... Many of us are far removed from our childhood songs and experiences with them.So before we can sing together, we need to talk, and remember, and feel the magic of those first experiences. And then we too, will be ready to sing!
Please share a favorite memory of a song, or experience. Share the songs you remember from your own childhood. Maybe your dad sang you to sleep with an old cowboy or rock and roll song. Or maybe your mother always hummed whiled she was folding laundry. It all matters, it's all related, and it all gives us reasons to sing with our kids!
In my next post, I'll share some of the wonderful, funny, and thoughtful stories people have been sharing with me lately.
past experiences that might be of assistance on this journey. Many years ago when I did my first music workshop for teen unwed moms, I was sure they would all be singing with their babies by the time I left. I went in with all my passion and usual enthusiasm, and hit the brick wall that is not uncommon with this group.They are, after all, first and foremost, teenagers!
So I went home and tried to re-think my approach. I realized that before I could get them to connect with their babies through singing, they would have to connect with their own childhood stories of song. If I could help them see how they connected emotionally through music, I might be able to then motivate them to sing with their babies. So here was my shot-in-the-dark plan. I recorded five short snippets from instrumental songs. They were all background tracks from movies, so the intention of the composer was very clear. As I played each 20-second piece, I asked the girls to write down whatever emotions, pictures, or words came into their heads. The results astounded all of us! Every girl wrote down a word that was spot on with the composer's intention. For example, during an instrumental piece from the "Horse Whisperer," every girl wrote down the word horse! The final piece was an obscure medley of Disney music, which moved into When You Wish Upon A Star. By the third note of that familiar and comforting song, there was a collective "ahh," and smiles of delight on every face. As much as I know how music communicates, I was astounded by the results of my experiment. As we shared the words they had written down, something happened. One by one the girls began remembering a song or experience with singing, long ago buried inside them (the week before, with crossed arms, they had all told me they had NO memories of songs from their childhoods). As they talked they became more and more animated and emotional, and I was able to say, "See? That's the way music works. And when you sing with your baby, you are creating the same memories and bonds with them!" And then they were ready to sing with their babies. They got it! It was one of the most rewarding experiences I've ever had.
So now you ask, what does this have to do with Sing With Our Kids? Well, every time I talk to anyone about this project, they remember something. And they share their stories with me. So what I learned from those teenage moms so many years ago, and what I am being reminded of now is this... Many of us are far removed from our childhood songs and experiences with them.So before we can sing together, we need to talk, and remember, and feel the magic of those first experiences. And then we too, will be ready to sing!
Please share a favorite memory of a song, or experience. Share the songs you remember from your own childhood. Maybe your dad sang you to sleep with an old cowboy or rock and roll song. Or maybe your mother always hummed whiled she was folding laundry. It all matters, it's all related, and it all gives us reasons to sing with our kids!
In my next post, I'll share some of the wonderful, funny, and thoughtful stories people have been sharing with me lately.
I love how you broke through with "listening." It's where all language and musicality begins.
ReplyDeleteThanks, Marylee. Good point, and you put it in a much more direct way!
ReplyDeletethere were always (here's where i date myself...) records playing in our house when i was growing up, either classical music or musicals. so there was always dancing and singing going on. oh, how i longed to be 16 going on 17! and my dad would dance with me and sing the song "maria" but put in my name instead. driving into oklahoma to visit my grandparents we sang "oklahoma," of course. i loved my mr. roger's records, i can still remember looking into the mirror on the front of the "you are special" cover. one of my favorite singing songs was "one potato, two potato" but i don't remember what record that came from... ah, the smell and feel of records. makes me wonder what our kids will remember.
ReplyDeleteHi Terina,
ReplyDeleteThose are great memories- and yes! I do wonder what sensory memories our children and grandchildren will have. Growing up in the 50's, we were all about musicals. In fact I would walk down the middle of the street singing and dancing my way up the block to visit friends. That's such a sweet memory of your dad! Thanks for sharing!